Hypnosis FAQ

What is hypnosis?

Hypnosis is a state of deep relaxation and focused concentration. It's sometimes described as a trance-like state. During hypnosis, a trained hypnotist (hypnotherapist) uses verbal cues, repetition, and imagery to guide you into this altered state of consciousness.

Here are some key points about hypnosis:

• Deep Relaxation: Like meditation, you'll feel calm and focused.

• Increased Suggestibility: You're more open to suggestions aimed at positive change.

• Not Mind Control: You remain in control throughout the session and can't be forced to do anything or say against your will.

• Altered Awareness: You're more aware of your inner thoughts and feelings but still aware of your surroundings.

• Awake: Hypnosis is not like sleep or being anesthetized. People often have regular conscious thoughts but they tend to be less scattered or distracting. Some people can’t even tell the difference between a hypnotic state and regular wakeful awareness.

Theories about Hypnosis: There's ongoing debate about how hypnosis works. Some believe it's an altered state of consciousness, while others see it as a form of focused attention or a collaborative effort between therapist and client. In either case, there is a wealth of long-established evidence-based research to support the efficacy of hypnosis.

Is hypnosis safe?

Generally, hypnosis is safe when done by a qualified and trained hypnotherapist. Here's a breakdown of the safety aspects:

• Minimal Risks: When performed correctly, hypnosis has minimal risks. Possible side effects can be mild and temporary, like headache, dizziness, or drowsiness.

• Importance of Qualifications: Safety depends on the hypnotist’s expertise. A qualified hypnotherapist will have proper training and understand how to manage any potential concerns.

• Not for Everyone: Hypnosis might not be suitable for those with certain mental health conditions like psychosis or dissociative disorders. Before trying hypnosis, discussing your medical history with a doctor or therapist is suggested.

What can hypnosis be used for?

Hypnosis has a range of potential applications. Here's a breakdown of some common uses:

Habit Change and Behaviors:

• Smoking Cessation: Studies show hypnosis can be a helpful tool to quit smoking, increasing success rates when combined with other methods.

• Weight Management: Hypnosis can help manage weight by addressing underlying emotional factors around food and promoting healthy habits.

• Stress and Anxiety Reduction: Hypnosis can induce relaxation and help manage stress and anxiety symptoms.

Pain Management:

• Chronic Pain: Hypnosis can be a valuable tool for managing chronic pain by helping individuals focus away from discomfort and promoting relaxation.

• Pain During Medical Procedures: Hypnosis can be used to reduce anxiety and pain during medical or dental procedures.

Mental and Emotional Wellbeing:

• Elevating old patterns and beliefs stemming from past trauma.

• Phobias: Hypnotherapy can help eliminate phobias and is often combined with NLP protocols for this process.

• Sleep Improvement: Hypnosis can help with sleep problems by promoting relaxation and addressing underlying causes of sleep disturbances.

• Boosting Self-Esteem: Hypnotherapy can be used to improve self-esteem by helping individuals focus on positive qualities and challenge negative self-beliefs.

Other Potential Uses:

• Improving Focus and Concentration: Hypnosis helps enhance focus and concentration by reducing distractions and promoting a state of focused attention.

• Past Life Regression: This and other spiritually-based exploration is supported by hypnosis.

Does hypnosis work?

Hypnosis requires a willingness to change and participate in the process as well as a skilled practitioner.

Here's a breakdown of the key points:

• Promising for Specific Issues: Research suggests hypnosis can be a helpful tool for managing various conditions. It shows promise for:

• Smoking Cessation: Studies indicate hypnosis can increase success rates when combined with other smoking cessation methods.

• Pain Management: Hypnosis can be effective in managing chronic pain and reducing anxiety associated with medical procedures.

• Anxiety and Stress Reduction: Hypnosis can be a valuable tool for relaxation and managing symptoms of anxiety and stress.

• Support for wellbeing: Hypnosis has a long history of being used in tandem with other healing modalities, such as therapy. It can ease disruptive emotions, support self-awareness, and improve self-confidence. 

• Understanding the self: When relaxed, we are primed to allow things to bubble up from the subconscious, such as the root cause of a concern. While more research is needed, there is a wealth of anecdotal evidence supporting hypnosis as a tool for identifying and/or alleviating the root cause of beliefs and behaviors.

How much does hypnosis cost?

The cost of a hypnosis session varies depending on things like the geographic area and the practitioner’s level of experience. A session generally runs between $125 to $350 per session. The number of sessions needed will also impact the total cost. Some hypnotherapists offer discount packages or a sliding scale.

Will insurance pay for hypnosis?

The short answer is no. Certified hypnotists cannot bill insurance for their services; however, a licensed therapist can bill insurance for a typical therapy session. If your licensed therapist offers hypnosis as a modality, then the session is generally covered (assuming the therapist is in-network and your insurance covers therapy).

Can anyone be hypnotized?

The short answer is yes. We all go in and out of different states of trance or focus without realizing it. 

Examples of trance or a hypnotic state:

Flow State: Anyone who has been absorbed in a project, book, movie, video game, or the like has probably experienced this state of focus. You tend to lose track of time, feeling that less time has passed. The brain excludes sensory details outside of the project, so you’re started when someone calls your name and is standing next to you; you don’t hear them coming!

Daydreaming: If you’ve been so lost in thought or a daydream that you didn’t feel time passing or you were oblivious to sound or other stimuli around you, you’ve been in hypnosis. This can happen when we’re reimagining a past scene or daydreaming about the future. You might startle when your phone rings or someone taps you on the shoulder because you were lost in your own world of imagination. This is a kind of hypnosis. 

Guided Meditation: If you’ve followed along with a live or recorded meditation and felt yourself become relaxed or immersed in the visualizations, you have been in a state of hypnosis. 

What does hypnosis feel like?

Hypnosis varies for each person. Some people describe being unaware of their bodies and feel fully immersed in the mental images or experiences, while others remain aware of their body and surroundings. Some people feel very relaxed, while others are less so. Each person is unique in the way they experience this altered state of consciousness.

A majority of people describe feeling awake throughout the process. Conscious cognitive awareness is active during hypnosis.

What if I can’t visualize things very well?

Some people expect a virtual reality-type experience, as often depicted on TV and in movies. That is not the way most people visualize. You may not “see” details in your mind’s eye but feel more of a knowing or experience of it.

For example, you may not be able to picture the details of a forest, but you know what one looks like and can build the inner experience of what it feels like to be in one. Detailed visuals are not necessary for hypnosis to work. 

Is hypnosis like mind control?

No. You remain awake and aware throughout the hypnosis process. No one can make you do something you’re not willing to do.

Can I get stuck in hypnosis?

No. Just as you cannot get stuck in a guided meditation, you cannot get stuck in hypnosis. 

Plant Medicine Integration

Plant Medicine Integration Versus Shamanic Healing

I sometimes speak with people wondering if they can use shamanic hypnosis to support or integrate a plant medicine journey. Or they are on the fence about which process to go with. This blog sheds light on how these two processes can support one another.

Similar with More Intention 

Many of my clients who have participated in plant medicine ceremonies, such as ayahuasca or psilocybin, report similar experiences in our sessions. They sense symbolic visuals and profound healing energy moving through them.

One difference is that in a HypnoShamanic journey, the process is more intentional. It is possible to follow an intention while using plant medicine, but many people encounter quickly changing visuals or ideas that may feel a bit meandering. 

Journeying with a spirit helper through a structured process with a clear healing intention can be more concentrated and easier to integrate. The healing is laser-focused, and therefore the results are specific. In a plant medicine journey, it is difficult to hold the energy of the intention once the journey begins. 

I have noticed that people who report having had a plant medicine journey may have an easier time relaxing into a HypnoShamanic session.

They feel more relaxed in letting go and allowing the process to ebb and flow. However, clients who have never worked with plant medicine are just as successful. Plant work is not needed to receive healing through hypnosis; it simply adds a layer of spiritual practice upon which to build.

Gentle Healing

For folks who haven’t done plant medicine but are thinking yet worried about it, shamanic hypnosis is a more gentle alternative. I cannot advise people to use or not use plant medicine. That is a personal choice and one you should research before making a decision.

It can be powerfully healing and can also cause people to feel like their ego self has been shattered in a way that makes it hard to move forward. Having support before, during, and after is a best practice to consider.

Hypnosis is another window beyond the conscious mind that can heal in a similar yet gentle way. Integration is built into the process of a hypnosis session. You can experience concentrated yet manageable healing.

If you’re worried that plant medicine might be too jarring, you might consider shamanic hypnosis as preparation or an alternative.

Plan Medicine Integration

Hypnosis creates a relaxed focus where messages from plant medicine can be revisited for clarity and integration. Using shamanic practice, my clients work with a Spirit Helper who offers guidance and support in understanding the messages.

For example, knowing where our pain or old patterns come from doesn’t necessarily alleviate the pain or stop the pattern.

We can know we are activated from past abuse, but that doesn’t stop the triggering the next time something reminds us of the abuse.

Integration reduces the pain and activation points and offers supportive advice, tips, tools, and techniques we can use to continue the healing. This is the kind of specifics that people get from their Spirit Helpers. 

This is where we can ask for clear-cut information, such as how or what to do with the message.

With help from Spirit, people can get definitive details on what to do to support their healing. This may be a specific type of meditation or energy work, an area of learning to follow, or specific habits to start or stop.

Shamic hypnosis is a powerful way to integrate and continue the healing received from a plant medicine journey.

If you’ve had a plant medicine journey and want support integrating or continuing the healing, reach out.

Ancestral Healing FAQ

Ancestral Healing: FAQ

Ancestral healing is an area of personal and spiritual exploration, but it can also be confusing for newcomers. This blog post aims to answer some of the most frequently asked questions about ancestral healing, providing a starting point for your journey.

What is ancestral healing?

Ancestral healing focuses on acknowledging, understanding, and healing the wounds and unresolved experiences of your ancestors that have carried on through the generations. These can be traumas, emotional burdens, or even cultural aspects that continue to impact your life and the lives of your descendants. This process can involve various practices, from connecting with your lineage through research and storytelling to rituals and energy work to release negative patterns.

Why is ancestral healing important?

The experiences of our ancestors, both positive and negative, can leave an imprint on our lives. Unhealed ancestral wounds can manifest as recurring patterns, negative beliefs, or unexplained emotional blocks. Ancestral healing can help break these cycles, leading to greater personal growth, self-awareness, and emotional well-being.

How does ancestral healing work?

• Explore the issue: Focusing on the patterns in yourself and your known family, we identify the healing needed.

• Create an intention: Successful shamanic healing requires a clear intention.

• Gather support: Spirit helpers are called to protect and support the healing process.

• Shamanic journey: Using hypnosis and intuitive guidance, we journey to the source of the pain and suffering.

• Explore the healing lesson: Every trauma has an origin story and a healing lesson. For example, a traumatic origin that began with a betrayal may need trust and forgiveness to move on. We access the healing needed for the specific trauma.

• Self-healing: The energy of the healing lesson builds at the individual level first. Gathering and growing the powerful energy heals the present.

• Healing through time: The healing energy is amplified and sent through the past and future.

• Meditation for continued strength: You come away with a meditation to support the integration of your healing as you move forward.

Is ancestral healing for everyone?

Ancestral healing can be a powerful tool for personal growth, but it's important to approach it with respect and sensitivity. If you have experienced significant trauma or have concerns about family dynamics, consider working with a therapist or facilitator experienced in ancestral healing.

What happens after a session?

Many people feel a sense of catharsis, sensing something important has happened. People often feel the session's intensity but also feel energized by it.

In the days after, my clients report feeling the old, unwanted pattern drained of energy and fading or completely gone. They feel the healing energy sustaining them in both subtle and powerful ways.

What are the benefits of ancestral healing

• Release generational trauma

• Stop unwanted patterns

• Focused healing

• Energized and calmer

• Transform negative energy

Session details

• Sessions are 1.5 - 2 hours long

• In-person or virtual

• Cost: $175

Remember: Ancestral healing is a personal journey. Be patient, respectful, and trust your intuition as you explore this path. It can be a deeply transformative experience, leading to greater personal understanding, healing, and connection to your lineage.

Brainspotting FAQ

Brainspotting Blog FAQ

What is Brainspotting?

Brainspotting was discovered in 2003 by David Grand, PhD, a trauma therapist and EMDR practitioner. While working with a professional figure skater who was struggling to master a triple loop, Grand noticed that her eyes would involuntarily fixate on a specific spot when she recalled a traumatic experience. He observed that when she held her gaze on this spot, she was able to access and process her trauma in a deeper way than she had been able to with EMDR.

Grand began to experiment with this technique with other clients and found that it was consistently effective in helping them process and heal from trauma. He named the technique "Brainspotting" because it is based on the idea that where you look affects how you feel.

Brainspotting is based on the theory that the brain stores traumatic memories in a network of interconnected neurons. When a person is triggered by a reminder of the trauma, these neurons activate and cause the person to experience the same emotions, thoughts, and physical sensations that they felt during the original event.

Brainspotting is a promising new therapy that has been shown to be effective in treating a wide range of trauma-related conditions.

How does Brainspotting work?

Brainspotting works by helping you identify and focus on the specific spot in your visual field that is associated with trauma. This helps to activate the neural network associated with the trauma and bring it into conscious awareness. Once the trauma is in conscious awareness, the person can begin to process and heal from it.

Brainspotting is based on the idea that our brains have specific eye positions that are associated with different emotions and experiences. When we focus on these eye positions, it can help us to access and process these emotions and experiences.

What conditions can Brainspotting be used to treat?

Brainspotting can be used to treat a wide range of conditions, including:

• Trauma (PTSD, complex trauma, developmental trauma)

• Anxiety

• Depression

• Phobias

• Chronic pain

• Stress

• Grief and loss

• Relationship problems

• Performance anxiety

• Creative blocks

What is a typical Brainspotting session like?

A typical Brainspotting session begins with discussing what you would like to work on. Then, I’ll guide you to find a Brainspot, which is an eye position that is associated with the issue you would like to address.

Once you have found a Brainspot, I’ll ask you to focus on it and notice any thoughts, feelings, or bodily sensations that arise.

We’ll continue to work together until you feel that you have resolved the issue you were working on. This may take one session or several sessions, depending on the complexity of the issue.

How long does a Brainspotting session last?

Sessions are typically 50 minutes. We’ll spend some time talking about the issue and then begin finding a brain spot.

Is Brainspotting safe?

Brainspotting is generally considered to be a safe and effective technique. However, it is important to work with a qualified Brainspotting practitioner who has been trained in the proper techniques.

What are the benefits of Brainspotting?

Brainspotting has been shown to be effective in treating a wide range of conditions. It can help people to:

• Reduce their symptoms of trauma, anxiety, depression, and other mental health conditions

• Improve their emotional regulation

• Increase their self-awareness

• Heal from past wounds

• Live more fulfilling lives

What are the differences between EMDR and Brainspotting?

The main difference between EMDR and Brainspotting is the way that they use BLS. In EMDR, BLS is used throughout the entire therapy session. In Brainspotting, BLS is used only when the client is focused on their Brainspot.

Another difference between the two techniques is the way that they approach trauma. EMDR focuses on processing specific traumatic memories. Brainspotting is more holistic and can be used to process a wider range of emotional experiences, including those that are not directly related to trauma.

Which therapy is more effective?

Both EMDR and Brainspotting have been shown to be effective in treating a variety of conditions, including trauma, anxiety, depression, and phobias.

Some studies suggest that Brainspotting may be more effective than EMDR for certain conditions, such as chronic pain and complex trauma (trauma stemming from ongoing or multiple events).

How to Improve Self-Acceptance

Self-acceptance is about accepting yourself for who you are, flaws and all. It is about loving and respecting yourself, even when you make mistakes.

A resilient sense of self-acceptance means you are more likely to be happy and successful in life.

tips on how to improve self-acceptance:

• Be kind to yourself. Talk to yourself the way you would talk to a friend. Be patient, understanding, and forgiving.

• Understand your negativity bias. We all have a built-in bias toward what’s wrong. That’s why you can get 10 compliments on something and one criticism - and guess which one you’ll focus on?

  Don’t beat yourself up, this is evolutionary. We all do it. Just notice and use that noticing as a tool to choose to focus on the positives.

• Accept your flaws. Everyone has flaws. It is what makes us human. Embrace your flaws and learn to love them.

  Think about friends, kids, or loved ones who have that quirkiness about them. Apply that same concept of loving them for ALL of who they are on yourself.

• Focus on your strengths. Everyone has strengths. Make a list of your strengths and focus on them.

  You choose the story you tell yourself about who you are. Pick the one that emphasizes the many positive traits you have.

• Set realistic goals. Don't set yourself up for failure by setting unrealistic goals. Start with small, achievable goals and work your way up to bigger ones.

  Try doing something for just 5 minutes and work up from there. Apply habit stacking, where you do something new after an already-established habit (like 5 sit-ups after you brush your teeth).

• Take care of yourself. Eating a healthy diet, getting enough sleep, and exercising regularly can all help to improve your self-esteem. Treat yourself like a loved one!

• Spend time with positive people. Surround yourself with people who help you feel good about yourself and avoid people who don’t.

• Practice gratitude. Take some time each day to think about all the things you are grateful for. This will help you to focus on the positive aspects of your life. Bonus points for setting a time a few times a day to do this!

• Hypnosis. If you are struggling with self-acceptance, hypnosis is a powerful way to release old, negative beliefs and replace them with self-confidence and self-appreciation.

Self-acceptance is an ongoing process. It takes time and effort to develop a healthy sense of self-worth. But it is worth it. When you accept yourself for who you are, you can live a happier and more fulfilling life.

Soul Retrieval FAQ

What is soul retrieval?

A soul retrieval is an ancient shamanic practice that exists in just about every shamanic culture ever studied. It involves recovering lost essence, energy, or “soul parts” that have dislodged due to trauma.

This soul loss doesn’t mean you’re separated from that soul essence. It’s more like it’s hiding under the metaphorical bed, stuck in a state of fear, sadness, hurt, or other difficult emotions. It’s drawing off vital life force that can cause a person to feel tired, uncertain of themselves, lackluster about life, or even fearful.

How does soul retrieval work?

Traditionally, a shamanic practitioner goes into a trance state and, with the help of their spirit guides, recovers the soul part and integrates it back into the body. The client is generally laying down and waiting.

However, my process is more interactive and utilizes hypnosis so you can participate as well as heal on an emotional level - as well as spiritually.

Bringing the soul essence back into the integrated whole is like having your full self back.

It is a powerful part of healing and stepping into your authentic self.

How is my process different?

1. My HypnoShamanic soul retrieval process is done in tandem with the client. First, I use hypnosis to help you release and reframe the emotional aspects of the trauma.

2. Rather than integrating the soul energy right away, we take it to a healing place where your power animal or guide will aid the release of fear, hurt, and other difficult feelings.

   During this healing time, you’ll have homework to visit your soul part and let them get to know the current you.

3. In our second session, about a week later, we’ll use hypnosis and the element of Fire to release anything left that needs to heal. We will both have work to do during the integration so you have a fuller experience of the process.

4. Next, we visit the Healing Waters to soothe the way for your reclaimed, integrated soul essence to spread out and feel at home.

5. Lastly, we celebrate! You’ll invite the energy of friends, family, loved ones, and spirit helpers to join you in a celebration of your own soul’s homecoming.

   This joyful process solidifies your powerful healing.

What are the benefits of soul retrieval?

Each person is unique in how they feel after a soul retrieval. Some people feel a strong difference right away while others experience a more subtle, yet powerful impact over time.

Some Benefits of soul retrieval healing

• No longer triggered by the traumatic event

• Feel more whole and authentically yourself

• Confidence in being yourself around others

• Able to trust the moment and be present

• More energy, motivation, and passion

• Able to connect and trust others

• Underlying feeling of calm and peace

• Less reactive and more accepting

• Experience less anxiety and fear

• Experience less depression

What should I expect from a HypnoSHamanic soul retrieval session?

These sessions last about 1.5 to 2 hours each. We start with creating an intention statement to set a clear trajectory for your healing.

Once we have an intention statement, We’ll begin hypnosis. This is a state or relaxation and focus. Where we’ll call your spirit helpers to support the healing process.

You’ll have time to spend with a power animal or spirit guide, allowing that connection to become clear. You can come back to this connection for help and healing on your own in the future.

You will feel guided and supported by me and your guide throughout the process. We’ll use clinical hypnosis to explore and release old emotional triggers and shamanic practice to reclaim your lost energy.

Who can benefit from soul retrieval?

Everyone has experienced soul loss. It’s a way of coping and can be caused by “capital-T trauma” or “lower case-t trauma.” A simple snide comment can cause part of us to shut down emotionally and soul essence to split off.

Anyone willing to explore emotional and spiritual healing at the deepest levels can benefit from a soul retrieval.

My unique HypnoShamanic Healing process brings you fully into the experience for holistic healing.

How to prepare for a soul retrieval session

Because this healing process is based on an intention - wanting to heal a specific aspect of yourself and your life - it’s a good idea to know what aspect that is.

This may be something like healing a block in becoming more emotionally connected to people. It may be something like wanting to gain confidence in being your true, authentic self. It could be to release triggers related to a specific relationship or trauma.

Having a sense of what you’d like to improve is a great starting point for a soul retrieval process.

A curious mind and authentic willingness to explore and grow is a great mindset to have when starting this powerful healing process.

How often should one undergo a soul retrieval session?

Traditionally, a soul retrieval was done within 3 days after a trauma has occurred. Of course, in today’s world, it’s often been years or even decades since a traumatic event has taken place. A general rule of thumb is to tackle one intentional healing at a time and leave at least 6 months before starting another.

For some individuals, a single soul retrieval is all that’s needed to gain the healing they need. Other people find they want to continue with deeper levels of healing, after a period of integration.

Stop Self-Sabotaging and Find Joy

Why is it so hard to make a habit out of goals that bring us joy?

Do you have activities you enjoy, yet you can’t seem to get yourself to do them? I’m not talking about things you know you should do, like exercise or eating healthily.

What I'm referring to are the things that bring us joy when we’re doing them. For some reason, we resist doing them anyway. Why do we do that?

It's not your fault!

I often see this with clients struggling to stick to a creative activity. They’ve dreamed of writing a novel or they’ve always loved playing guitar. They set the time to practice their craft only to find...

when that time rolls around, that they would rather be doing anything else!

Then the negative self-talk sets in:

“I’m too lazy,”

“I’m worthless,”

“I’ll never really be a _____ [writer, musician, etc.]”.

What they don’t realize is that this negative self-talk makes them feel even worse...

adding to the negative associations they have with the creative activity.

Learn how to identify the goals that bring you joy and how to commit to them in the full article.

Change Your Past — And Reclaim Your Future

Many things contribute to the way we define ourselves. Some we have no choice on, like where you’re born, while others we get to define, like an affiliation with a political party.

We tend to think of the events of our past as something in the “no choice” category. They happened and we can’t change how it’s affected us, right? But what if you can change the way your past impacts your identity?

How would you know what kind of friends you prefer, what type of work you enjoy, or what you like in a partner until you’ve given it a try? From the foods we love to the situations that are uncomfortable, it’s all information we picked up through past experience.

Past experiences become the lens through which we view life and ourselves.

Finding the better story

The story we tell ourselves about who we are and how we are is a mindset. A mindset is a habitual perspective - a story we tell ourselves over and over. It is a way of seeing things.

The good news is, habits are changeable. It just takes a little commitment. Your perspective of your identity is the foundation of your self-esteem. Many people want to improve their sense of confidence and self-esteem. One powerful way of doing that is to develop a new perspective, or habit of mind, on who you are as a result of your past.

No matter how negatively a past experience has impacted you, the very fact that you’re still here makes you a survivor. Even if you struggle, your tenacity allows you to keep going.

Learn how to cast yourself as the hero of your own story in my latest article, published by YourTango:

If you love the article, be sure to share it with others!

What would your best friend say?

Most of us are aware that we’re harder on ourselves than anyone else. We’re so much more capable of letting our friends and family off the hook for minor offenses than we are for our own mistakes. Forgiving ourselves our imperfections can be an incredibly freeing experience!
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How do you forgive yourself?​
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First, know that changing a mindset takes time and patience. Start there - patience! ​
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Set an alarm on your phone or choose times of the day to check in on your thoughts. Each time you eat is a good time to do this. Noticing the patterns in your thinking is the first step to changing them.
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1. Notice what you’re thinking

2. Be kind about what you find

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If you find yourself thinking negative thoughts about yourself, your actions, or your potential future, be sure not to pile on by haranguing yourself for it. Whatever you notice about your thoughts, give yourself a high-five for noticing.

You want the act of noticing to feel good. Dial that in with positive reinforcement - no matter what you’ve just caught yourself thinking.
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There are many ways of changing a through pattern, once you notice it. Here are a few:

• What if it’s possible statements - Play a game of all the things that could go right. What if it’s possible that I’m more awesome than I realize? What if it’s possible my future is more amazing than I could imagine? What if it’s possible I win the lottery or get “discovered” by a talent agent and star in a movie/audiobook/podcast, etc.?

• Talk to yourself like your best friend would. What would a loving friend say? You can even make it fun and imaginative by giving yourself a nickname for this process.
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• For every negative label you give yourself, think of a positive flipside. There are always positives! If you’re calling yourself lazy, then maybe you’re also good at balancing rest with work. If you’re calling yourself indecisive or bad at focusing, maybe you're also curious and have many passions. There’s always a positive attribute to focus on.
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• Negotiate with your parts. Imagine you can have a loving conversation with the part of yourself that you want to change. What would she say? How is she trying to help, even if it’s not the way you want to be helped? Is there a compromise you can come to? How can that part of you continue to look after your best interests in a way that matches your goals?
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• Hold space in your heart. Imagine there’s a wide, expansive space in your heart. Imagine holding all the parts you want to change, in that heartspace. Just hold them in love. Don’t try to change them. Just give them a break and some room to be loved, just as they are!

Did you like this article? Did you find it helpful?

Like, Share, Comment below!

Advice my Clients Get from their Guides

In years of listening to advice given to my clients from their higher selves, spirit guides, power animals, and the like, there's definitely a few common themes.

One of those common pearls of wisdom is…

Lighten up!

We take things entirely too seriously! It’s natural, we’re taught to “grow up” from a very early age. Maturity is practically defined by how much you worry and stress over the details of life!

After years of helping clients tap into their intuitive guidance, it’s abundantly clear that our spiritual support teams want us to stop all that stressing and be more playful and joyful in our lives.

Even in the deep healing work my clients are moving through, it doesn’t need to be disruptive and earth shattering.

We’re often sold on the belief that healing is serious. We think it needs to take time and be painful in order to work.
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But why? Why does it NEED to be HARD?​
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What if it’s possible that it can be fun, interesting, and heart-based?

If we could think our way out of our old patterns, we’d have done it long ago!

What if simply setting and intention and letting the heart take the reins can bring about deep healing?

What if it can be light, playful, and fun?

Afterall, a traumatic imprint can happen in an instant. Who wrote the rule that undoing that imprint has to take years of hard work?

There are just as many stories of people who were changed for the better after a single incident.

The mind is a trickster!​
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I often encourage clients not to get into their heads about the work we do together. They don’t need to understand every angle of a memory that came up or why they experienced a certain feeling at a certain time.

That is the ego-mind trying to take back control. It doesn't like change!

When a person can trust themselves and the process, without overthinking what this memory meant or why that feeling popped up, then they’re able to…

ALLOW the healing to happen. ​
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Clients’ spirit guides are forever telling them to ask for help and then RELAX.

They want us to imagine all the positive possibilities. Aren’t they just as possible as the things we’ve been worrying about?

Even if the outcome we’re worried about comes to pass, worrying only elongates the amount of time we sit in the pain and suffering. We can spend weeks worrying (aka, suffering) over something that never happens. And, even if it does, how does adding weeks of suffering to the situation help?

It IS POSSIBLE!​
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I’ve personally seen client after client heal in a way that was much LIGHTER AND FASTER than they expected. Healing work really can be easier than we think if we’re willing to trust and allow ourselves to…

lighten up!

Try using those positive “What if…” statements to interrupt your worrying.
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Set a positive intention and focus on all the ways things could go well.
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Be playful with it!
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Come up with fun and creative outcomes, no matter how far fetched they are.

When you do, you’ll feel better!
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And that’s one way we can lighten up!

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Are you the Hero of your Journey?

Lately, I’ve been thinking about the beliefs we have around healing. Our culture perpetuates the idea that healing from trauma has to take years…

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​And lots of hard work! ​
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Maybe that’s true sometimes and for some people. But does it always have to be that way? ​
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What if it’s possible that healing our wounds of the past is easier than we think?

I see clients make massive progress in a single session or two. This is not due to some great or special wisdom unique to me, as a facilitator. I know, because I have colleagues who see the same amazing results.

There are many ways that healing old wounds can be easier and more fun than we expect.
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One way…
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Is to change the belief that it needs to be hard!

If we expect things to be hard, then we set ourselves up…

We don’t allow anything that falls short of a long, difficult process to be “real.”

Here is a technique I use when an old pattern reveals itself:

Viewing events as gifts

I make myself the hero of the event. Rather than focusing on the hurt, the anger, or whatever emotions are connected to the issue, I see the ways it’s helped me grow.
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This allows me to see it as a positive in my life. Something that’s helped me (even if the person or people involved don’t deserve any credit for my positive outcomes.)
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I ask myself questions like:

1. How did I feel at the time?

2. How have I grown or changed for the better since feeling that way?

3. What strengths have I acquired?

4. Am I more understanding or compassionate towards others who are going through something similar?

5. Have I learned things to avoid or do differently?

6. Who I am, now, since surviving this?
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I get playful and tell myself a hero’s tale of the journey and how I have used the events for the greater good.

What story can you retell from your past? Are there ways you can focus on the positive changes it’s created for you rather than the difficulties?

How to Be the Light and See the Light

I used to get sucked into the political polarities and wonder how some people can possibly come to believe what they do. If I’m being honest, I still struggle with this at times. 

There are so many hate-based conspiracies going around. How do we cross that divide and see people as part of our human community - as part of ourselves? 

Connection as light

We can accept one another, without accepting another’s beliefs. It begins with focusing on the common light. That source energy that connects us all.

Whether you see that as spiritual or metaphorical, we’re part of the web of life and what any one of us does, creates a vibration that touches us all. 

In the past few years, I’ve started practicing (again, but with more consistency) a technique that I was taught by one of my favorite shamanic teachers, Sandra Ingerman. 

This practice is so powerful that it can heal the environment. (See her book Medicine for the Earth: How to Transform Personal and Environmental Toxins, if you want to dive deeper.)

Sandra’s simple meditation is this:

1. Find a quiet, meditative space, close your eyes, and take some cleansing breaths. Relax.

2. Imagine the light of the sun, a star, or the moon. Bring to mind the effortlessness of that light. A star shines without trying.

3. Imagine that light is shining from within you with the same effortlessness.

4. Allow that light to shine from every cell in your body. Easily, without doing anything and without trying. 

5. Imagine that light grows to surround you, filling the room. Then let it grow to fill the city, the country, the earth, and the universe. 

This powerful meditation can also be done for others…

By that, I mean, you can imagine the light shining from within another person. Try this when you hear someone espousing something that offends you.

Try it when you’re arguing with someone.

Try it when someone cuts you off in traffic and then gives you the finger like you’re the one who did something wrong! 

Warning: This meditation builds deep roots in your life if you practice it regularly. You’ll find yourself letting things go more easily…

becoming more relaxed and at ease with yourself and the circumstances around you.

Practice at your own risk! :)

I trust you to handle the F-word

In neuro linguistic programming (NLP) and hypnosis training, practitioners are taught to stay away from this F-word…

FORGIVENESS! 

We’re supposed to say “release” or “letting go of the past.” And, I have found it to be true that many clients say “I’ve already dealt with my feelings about _____ [my mom, dad, abuser, etc.]” 

They’ve come to heal their inner child, not rehash the hurtful behavior of other people.

The truth is, they’re inseparably connected. You have to deal with the deep emotions related to that person’s behavior before you can be free of the past. Forgiveness is an integral part of healing the inner child, reclaiming yourself, and moving forward as a person who is free!

And, it can be done!

My Story of Forgiveness

My mother favored my brother. I know, I know, big deal, right? Most parents have a clear favorite. My mother’s preference for my younger brother was so pronounced, that it was as if I stopped existing when I was three, and my brother was born. Neighbors and friends of my parents commented to my dad, advocating on my behalf. 

When I became an adult, I was CERTAIN I had dealt with this. My mother died when I was nine, so it wasn’t like her behavior went on for that long into my life. I also don’t remember her very well, so it didn’t seem to matter. I had processed it. I was over it - that’s what I would have told you.

I wasn’t…

I came to realize this when an aunt gave me letters my mother had written to her when I was a baby. My aunt had held on to them for years and wanted me to enjoy reading about how much my mother loved me.

Those letters sat unread in a drawer for years! I couldn’t bring myself to open them. 

But why?

The truth was, that I was very dedicated to the story I had of my mom. She didn’t care about me. She only loved my brother. I didn’t want to hear anything different. I had already dealt with all of this! I’d forgiven her. (Or, so I told myself.)

When I finally read those letters, full of words from a mother who loved her infant daughter, I was… ANGRY

Yep, super pissed off. I found myself stopping to say out loud, “You’re lying!” or “Yeah, right!” I felt she was trying to play the doting mom, but I knew better! She was a fake.

There was a well of anger I had yet to face. All my “processing” hadn’t gotten me as far as I thought. 

I used a process that I now practice with my clients to tap into that anger. I allowed myself to recognize it. To feel it! It was hard because I wanted to see myself as having risen above these baser feelings. I wanted to be better than that. I saw myself as compassionate and understanding. - And, over it!

It’s natural to want to choose a more enlightened view. That’s a sign of the true progress I’d made. But, it was also the rug under which I had swept my anger. I didn’t want to feel the anger I thought was petty and judgemental. 

But, the anger was there, and it was real. I could try to rise above by pretending it wasn’t, or I could tap into it and feel it. The choice to face it and feel it is what set me free. 

The truth is, my mother, like all people, had more depth than existed in my story of her. She was an imperfect human, deserving of compassion and understanding. I thought I understood that, but I couldn't truly FEEL that compassion until I’d let go of the anger.

Why it matters

I tell you this, not to boo-hoo over my past or gain your sympathy. I share this as an example of how easy it can be to feel “over it” when we’re not. To want to deny those less evolved emotions that underlie our past hurts. 

And, to tell you that you can rewrite the story!

Once I acknowledged my emotions and allowed myself to feel them, I stopped being triggered by things that seemed unfair. I was able to let go of old patterns related to that pain and anger. 

Now I helped clients do the same IN A SINGLE SESSION! It really can be that easy.

Be gentle with yourself. You have a right to those baser feelings. They’re natural and they have to come out of the shadows and be recognized before they can truly be released. 

That’s when the magic begins! 

How do you let it go?

I’ve found hypnosis to be powerfully effective, but here are some others techniques:

• Emotional Freedom Technique (aka Tapping)

• Ho'oponopono

• Metta meditation

• Journaling 
  I go into detail about these tools as well as how to tell when you’ve really forgiven someone in my blog. Check it out and see which process works best for you.

How I became a runner when I HATE to exercise!

I’ve said it before and I’ll continue to repeat this:

All self-talk is self-hypnosis!

Let me know if this sounds familiar: you have that goal or resolution in mind, you have it all mapped out - the when and the where you’ll do it…

But, there’s an overwhelming feeling of dread that you’ll just disappoint yourself, again!

Trust me, I get it. I’ve been there.

Fear of Hope

Sometimes it feels easier to fail right away rather than go so far and fail later. Fear of hoping it’ll work this time can be even harder than feeling afraid to fail.

How do we get past this?

I used to HATE to exercise. It didn’t take much exertion to get my heartrate up and make my lungs burn. Now I’m a regular runner (okay, more like a walk-jog-walker) and I actually love it!

But before I got there, I started and stopped more times than I have fingers to keep track with.

How did I go from huffing and puffing in misery and stalling out the same week I started, to a regular runner 4 to 5 times a week?

Here’s what worked for me:

1. I changed what I thought and felt about running. Instead of thinking about past failures or how winded I get, I’d think “What if it’s possible I love running today?”

   Then I’d think about how great it feels to finish. How much I love coming home, changing out of my exercise clothes, and feeling tired and happy! I also saved my favorite podcast or audiobook only for that when I’m running.

2. After a run, I’d reinforce those thoughts and feelings by congratulating myself for little things. Maybe today I pushed through to the end of that one block, when I thought I couldn’t or, maybe, I increased my time a little. Or, maybe I had a hard day and ran even though I felt tired and grouchy the whole time. Good job me!

3. I changed my mindset from pass/fail (pass if I ran on the days I planned, fail if I didn’t) to a process. Whether I ran all the times I had scheduled or none of them, I was still on the path. (If that sounds familiar, it’s because I mentioned the same technique in getting my daily meditation practice going.)

   A path that I saw as ongoing, day by day. Each day was a new opportunity, no matter what came before. And, all I had to focus on was THAT DAY. Nothing else!

Pro Tips:

Other helpful things were joining online challenges where I put a little money on the line and had to run a certain number of days to get it back.

I also signed up for a 5K run with a friend, three months out, so I knew I had to make progress or bail on my friend.

There are so many motivation apps and ways to find a community or partner for extra accountability. Plug into something that works for you.

I believe in you, and I want you to believe in yourself, too!

Remember that life is a practice, not an endgame. You get to keep practicing. Take your goals one day at a time. Even one hour at a time, if it helps.

Find positive parts to focus on and give yourself tons of happy dances for the smallest of progress!

You’ll make a habit out of your new goal in no time, but more importantly, you’ll have fun doing it!

Know anyone who would benefit from these tips?

Hit “Share” below and let your friends in on the secret.

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Do this 5 minute thing and watch your life change!

Quick question: do you meditate?

​I know, I know, it’s hard to stick to, right? I used to meditate so sporadically! I felt great when I did it and I’d think, Why aren’t I doing this all the time?

But, then I’d get into a stressful period (when meditation would have the highest benefit) and I’d feel like, I just can’t!

Part of my problem was that I had a pass/fail approach. If I got into that zone where I feel blissful and calm, I was doing it “right” and if I was distracted with a wandering mind most of the time, it was a big “fail.”

Meditation IS the practice… not the getting it right!

I came to understand that those times when I felt like I wasn’t meditating at all were just as important. It’s a practice of noticing when your mind wanders, not the practice of blissful calm.

I also adjusted my expectations for myself. I couldn't stick to my 30-minute meditation per day goal. I could, however, do five minutes before turning out the lights for the night.

That became my only goal. Now, years later, I still only hold myself to a five minute minimum, although I generally meditate at least 20 minutes.

Studies have borne out what my personal observations have shown me: meditation increases goal congruence. No matter what your plans are for self improvement, you’d be hard pressed not to find a way that it would be improved by regular meditation.

It’s in the pause.

I talk to many of my clients about adding five minutes of meditation to their daily routine. Either first thing when you get up or right before bed tend to be the easiest times to start a meditation practice.

Meditation strengthens your ability to notice when your mind wanders and then bring it back to task. Of course, that strengthens your overall ability to focus, but what interests me most is that it helps you notice when you’re being pulled toward behavior you want to stop.​

I’ve talked about how the environment works as a stimulus for specific behaviors (come home from work, eat a snack in front of the TV) now we’re looking at habits of mind. When you pause before giving in to automatic behaviors and notice what you were thinking and feeling, you begin to understand the pattern.

When you understand the pattern, you can change it!​

Try this:​

​If you’re trying to give up or reduce a behavior (including avoidance of a behavior you want to start), pause! Give yourself permission to do the unwanted behavior in five minutes, if you still want to. But, first, meditate.

1. Rate the level of craving or feeling of avoidance.

2. Meditate for five minutes. Try a meditation app. I use Insight Timer. Set a timer for five minutes or find a 5-minute guided meditation you like.

3. Rate your feelings again. Notice whether they’ve come down.

4. Give yourself a mental high-five for noticing the craving and pausing.

You may be surprised at how much you’ve reduced the temptation or craving toward the undesirable behavior.

However, this is a practice! Meaning, you’ll get better with time. So, if you try it and still do the thing you were trying to avoid, don’t beat yourself up.

Remember the brain likes novelty and things that feel good. Don’t pile on with negative self-talk. Congratulate yourself for noticing, meditating, and moving on with your day.

In time, that pause will loosen the grip of unwanted habits and support the behaviors you want.

​Know anyone who would benefit from these tips?

Hit “Share” below and let your friends in on the secret.

Join me on Facebook and Instagram to tell me what you tried, and how it worked for you.

Change a Habit by Changing your Environment

Wendy Wood is one of my favorite researchers and authors on habit formation. I love her book, Good Habits, Bad Habits: The Science of Making Positive Changes That Stick.

One thing that’s helped me, when reading her work, is that habits are good. They help us live life without the need to think about every little detail! In fact, it’s estimated that 80% of life is automatic behavior.

Our wired-in negativity bias makes it easy for us to focus on the habits we want to stop or those we can’t seem to get started. Take a moment to pat yourself on the back for the many good habits you already have (like brushing your teeth, showering, and feeding your pets/kids/self)!

Take heart; you are capable of starting a positive habit! You’ve already started tons of them!

Now that you’re feeling better about yourself, here are some of the biggest takeaways I’ve gotten from Wood’s work:

The environment plays a major role

• We do certain things at certain times. If you’re trying to start or stop something, take a moment to consider when and where you do the activity (like watching TV after work).

• Change up your routine so you’re in a different environment, even a different room. In the watching TV example, you might set up the dining area or another room with your craft supplies or whatever new habit you’d rather do than watch TV.

• Make the space inviting. Save that time for your favorite podcast, music, scented candles, tea, and whatever else you enjoy. Then head there after work, rather than where you watch TV.

• Limit the time you spend. Give yourself short bursts of the new activity - like 10 minutes. Set an actual alarm for that time, giving yourself permission to stop when it goes off. This reduces the resistance you feel to the new activity. Surely, you can manage just 10 minutes! :)

• When you’re done, do a little dance! No, seriously, get silly. High-five yourself. Sing. Be playful. This will induce the release of dopamine, which feels good and sets your brain up to want to do it again, shortening the number of repetitions it takes to form a habit.

A couple of Pro Tips

1. Remember that all self-talk is self-hypnosis, so tell yourself how excited you are to listen to that podcast while you paint. DO NOT tell yourself, “I’ll probably just end up watching TV instead.”

Remember, “what if it’s possible?” Use this phrase to get into the idea that you're building a new, positive practice. (Not an endgame, a practice! Something you’ll get better and better at.)

What if it’s possible this becomes a habit faster than I expect?

What if I love it so much, it becomes easy?

What if it works?

2. Before getting out of bed in the morning, imagine doing the new habit. Take a few minutes to see yourself going through each step. This has been proven again and again to increase the successful fulfillment of a task.

Habits: Using Friction to your Advantage

Setting yourself up for success: starting a new habit

In my last blog, I offered a couple tips for developing positive habits. Here are a couple more gems I’ve used in my own journey to create positive habits (and reduce bad habits):

Friction is your friend

When starting a new habit, even the slightest friction can significantly reduce our ability to complete the task. We’ve all experienced times when we were going to do something, looked at it, and decided it was too much work. That’s friction! You can use this friction to your advantage.

Remove friction - Make it easy to get moving with the new habit. If you want to start running in the morning, sleep in your running clothes or set them in the bathroom the night before so you can change into them right after brushing your teeth. Removing any little steps in the way will help you get it done.

Want to meditate more? Put your meditation cushion on your bed so it’s an easy reminder before you climb in bed. Want to eat healthier? Buy groceries for specific meals (and nothing else), then chop, clean, and group ingredients so they’re easier to prepare when you get home from work. Bonus points if you can prepare the meals on the weekend, so you’re set for the week.

Want to start a creative habit (painting, writing, playing an instrument)? Set up a space where everything you need is laid out and ready for the time you’ve set aside for that activity.

Add friction - Create barriers for the alternatives that might get in the way of the new habit. If you want to do something creative at the end of the day but you’re habituated to watching TV, remove the batteries from the remote and separate the remote from the batteries on opposite ends of your home.

Adding friction can also be used to stop a bad habit. Make it harder to do. Place small barriers in the way and easy alternatives in their place.

Small changes to your approach can have big results. Try adjusting friction to starting or stopping the habits you’re working on. You’ll be surprised how much difference it makes.

Inspire others by letting us know what you tried and how it worked! Connect with me on social media.

2 small habits that make big change

When I look back over all the tools and techniques I’ve learned, employed, and taught to others, there are two that stand out. I’ve already written about the habits of mind that make a huge difference, now, here are some that help with physical habits.

We all know how hard it can be to motivate ourselves to make positive changes that are good for us. It seems overwhelming the number of times we’ve started and stopped. Here are the pro tips I’ve used that have the largest impact:

Habit stacking - I learned this pro tip from S.J. Scott. He started doing push ups right after he went to the bathroom. He wanted to improve his strength and build muscle, but couldn’t get himself to the gym. He started stacking a new habit (push ups) with one that was already established (using the bathroom when you have a full bladder). He started with just a few pushups, then added more. By the end of the day, he was doing 40 - 50 push ups, ultimately achieving his goal of strength training.

You can apply this strategy to many things. Find something you already do, like brushing your teeth, then do the new habit right afterward.

Don’t delay anything that takes 5 minutes - This one I read in a random blog so long ago that I’m, sadly, unable to cite the author. The author suggests that anything that takes five minutes or less shouldn’t be put off. This includes things like cleaning a dish right after you use it, putting your coat in the closet and putting your shoes away when you come home, or paying a bill as soon as you receive it.

At the time, it takes so little effort and time to do that small thing. However, when you put these things off, they turn into a day’s worth of work. You trade a little effort now in exchange for saving yourself a large effort later.

As we go into the new year, add these small shifts to your routine and see if it starts off your new year a little better.

Know anyone who would benefit from these tips? Share this email with them!​

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Announcing FREE Hypnosis!

What FREE hypnosis do you want?

I love, love, love watching the expression on my clients’ face as they emerge from the healing trance of hypnosis. ​
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I get to facilitate, but all the magic happens inside a person’s mind. That smile and look of “Wow!” when a person opens their eyes is why I do this work. (Also, I happen to have the most amazing people on the planet as clients!)

I’ve decided to offer free hypnosis on Thursdays at noon (Pacific Time), starting in January. I’ll do this as a Facebook live call (also available in Zoom and, potentially, Instagram).

What hypnosis themes are you most interested in? I need your help deciding which subjects are of the highest interest. I’ll mix it up, so there’s something for everyone, but I want to hit those subjects that resonate most.

Click the link below to vote for the category of hypnosis that most benefits you.

All Self-Talk Is Self-Hypnosis

There’s something I still grapple with on occasion. See if this sounds familiar to you. I’ll have a powerful, moving spiritual experience, only to start second-guessing it about 20 minutes later. I’m really good at that one! Anyone else?

I see people asking, “Is it real?” and “Did it work?” in my sessions all the time. And yet, we have total faith in our worries as strong possibilities. No one has ever told me about anxiety over a possible negative outcome and then asked, “Is this a real possibility?” They already have total faith that it is!

All self-talk is self-hypnosis

We imagine unwanted outcomes all the time. We spend hours envisioning the possibilities we don't want. We never ask ourselves, ”Is this real?” If we use that time to enjoy a positive vision of the future, at the very least, our here and now feels better!

In the imagination, everything is real

When you watch a movie and react by crying over a sad scene or stressing out over the chase scene, your body and subconscious act as if it's happening. Sure, logically, you know they’re actors, and the story is fictional, but the impact on your emotions is real. Your subconscious mind takes everything literally and says, “As you wish.”

And that's where deep healing can happen. That's where manifestation can happen. It just requires a little faith in the positive.

What if you envision yourselves as healthy, thin, a non-smoker, without pain, self-motivated, and getting things done? - Pick the one you’re working toward. What if you use the same faith you have in your anxieties to expect a positive outcome?

But what if the worst happens and I’m not prepared?

It helps us feel ready when we’ve thought through all the negative outcomes we can. However, we can generally handle things that don’t go our way without much preparation. And, if things go well, how much time did we spend feeling worried over something that never happened?

It’s worth it to have faith in the positive AND faith in ourselves to handle whatever happens.

Mindsets are a habit

This doesn’t happen overnight. Believe me, I get that! I still have to remind myself to stop imagining the worst and play a best-case scenario through my mind’s eye. I also need to remind myself to see a learning opportunity when something I expected to go one way goes another.

How we think is a habit, just like brushing your teeth in the morning. Habits of mind take time to change. It helps to remember that your body and subconscious mind are always listening and taking everything literally.

Try asking yourself, “What if it’s possible things go well?”

What it’s possible is better than affirmations!

Affirmations tend to create emotional pushback. You’re telling yourself something you know isn’t true. Sure, if you say it enough, it can have a positive impact, but it could take years to sink in if the reality doesn’t match what you’re telling yourself.

Instead, ask yourself, “What if it’s possible I’m getting ______” (healthier, more motivated, richer, etc). We get pushback when we don’t believe a statement but not when we open to a possibility.

That's where the magic happens! That’s how you can pull yourself out of worry and rumination and bring your mind to a positive image.

The things you imagine and say to yourself build your reality.

Build one that feels good.

Reach out and tell me about your “What if it’s possible.” I’d love to hear it!